I was asked to write a guest post today on the age-old question, Which came first? Lust or Love? To answer that question, I’m going to tell you about how I met my husband.
I met my husband in a bar. He swears he loved me the moment we met, but I wasn’t so sure. I’d been burned before, and wasn’t willing to have anything serious. I was looking for casual sex, but he wasn’t a casual sex sort of guy. However, he is a GUY, so when we had sex before the ‘L’ word was professed, he didn’t exactly turn me down.
I was in lust with him immediately. The physiological responses were all there: sweaty palms, pounding heart, shortness of breath. I think my husband is hawt, always have. He has the wide shoulders, slim hips, glossy curls on his head, penetrating eyes, full lips, he’s my tall, dark and handsome drink of water. Yup, totally in lust with the man, even after 16 years.
But he had to work to earn my love, which came gradually. He helped my mom around the house, moved and got a job closer to where I lived, and basically pampered me silly until I would have called myself crazy to not be in love with him. He gave back rubs, supported my decisions, asked my opinions, watched horror movies he hated, and drew me pretty pictures. And he’s great in bed. Did I mention that?
I remember asking him once how he knew he was in love with me that moment when our eyes met by the pool table, right before he asked me to play (best game of my life, by the way). He shrugged and said, “I just knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life making you smile.”
So I guess the answer to the age old question of which came first, lust or love is: Depends on who you ask.